Law and Order: KI - A Cautionary Tale

I think Spring has finally sprung!  Woo Hoo!  My assistant decided to celebrate this by giving all our kids a dollar store pencil and eraser. They came in this morning and found the loot on their math journals.  One of my children, to whom we will refer as the defendant, immediately broke his pencil and in the ten minutes I was standing in the doorway greeting the children, proceeded to come over not once, but twice and tell me I "forgot" to sharpen his pencil; to which I replied, "NO, I didn't forget, I actually have something I'm supposed to be doing now and it is not sharpening your pencil."  This is where the tale takes a turn--pay attention, you may learn something....After everyone arrived, I then took said pencil to FIVE DIFFERENT PENCIL SHARPENERS.  None of them could sharpen the pencil.  So twenty minutes later, I had a nub with Easter Eggs on it and no lead.  I dug around in a draw and found a shiny, blue substitute pencil to placate our defendant.  This is when the crime was committed....

Here's the dollar store nub. Don't give these to your kids unless you want to spend all your time trying to sharpen them in a vain attempt to find the lead.



Here's the substitute pencil. He had this for approximately three minutes before he had to have it taken away.



Here's the defendant.



And here's his victim.



I'll let him tell you what he did. Note that he kind of indicates it's her fault for sticking her finger on the pencil.



Here's the victim's version of events. Notice she's so choked up at the end, she can no longer speak.



And here's the big apology...Sincere, isn't it?



Yes, that's right, in the three minutes he had the pencil, he stabbed someone with it and "it bleed". After I spent twenty minutes sharpening then replacing it.

That's what you get for giving out prizes at the BEGINNING of the day...